Last Friday we had our influx of freshmen into Taylor. Swallow Robin has somewhere around twenty new faces getting used to our wacky home. I have come to notice an odd occurrence among the upperclassmen, something that I noticed when I was a freshman. It's actually rather annoying, I think; and it doesn't give our new friends their fair due.
Freshmen are not pets.
I guess the latest "in" thing is a freshman tote, like the ones you put a little dog in. It seems to me that many upperclassmen decide it is their sworn duty to guide these naive little children into the brave new world that is college. Heaven forbid that they have some time on their own to set themselves up comfortably and get into things at their own pace.
Essentially what I'm getting at is that so many times it seems like freshmen are treated like they are incredibly young. The way I hear some people talk about the freshmen is almost patronizing. Is it impossible for a freshman to find their own class? Or pick their own table at the DC? They're not as needy and dependent as some try and make them out to be. When I was a freshman, I wasn't allowed to sit by myself in at a meal. Someone would always come over to sit by me and talk at me. I believe there are days when we all want a quiet (as quiet as a cafeteria can be anyway) meal alone with our thoughts. Solitude is not a bad thing.
What amazes me about this mindset is that most of the freshmen aren't that young. We'll say that eighteen is a base age for them. Many sophomores are only a year older, if that. Some freshmen are non-traditional, like my roommates, who are twenty-two and twenty-three. Yet still people insist on treating them like they can't handle their own affairs. They're as mature as we were our first year, give or take (I realize that isn't always a positive thing). We had a group prayer over our dorm's freshmen, and it made me rather cynical (more so anyway). I can't judge the intent or the affect of the prayers, that isn't fair but I will say that the words I heard were more along the lines of "Let these poor ignorant children get it" than the "Let these men and women establish themselves in our community."
I've thought a bit about how I interact with freshmen, and I'm pretty proud about it. I feel like I've treated them as I treat everyone else in my dorm, regardless of age. In college, age matters much less than it did in high school. I can be just as solid friends with the senior who is twenty as I am with the freshman that is twenty-two. Age and grade don't amount to much, it's who they are as people that we need to pay more attention to. Being real, and treating them like equals is the best way, I believe, to help anyone adjust to a new situation in life.
It is, however, always Joe's fault.
Just something to chew on.
Friday, September 2, 2011
Saturday, August 27, 2011
Wistful
I write this latest entry from my throne in Swallow Robin lounge. If you can't read between the lines in that last one, I'll spell it out: I'm back at Taylor. Being back at school means a lot of new experiences and people. There have been a variety of new freshman showing up, and I'm working through my new responsibilities as the theater's master electrician. With greeting all this new challenges comes an interesting opposite, however. What I'm talking about is saying good-bye.
Why do we romanticize leaving so much?
Like I've said before, I'm not a big movie guy. I do, however, know enough about movie cliches to point to all those moody romantic movies that invariably have a scene were someone is either walking away and causing tension and angst, or someone is walking away with serious hope and a new found sense of purpose. While I realize that only little kids and autistic monkeys might think their lives will end up like movies, I also feel that we try to create such emotion in our good-byes.
I worked at a camp in New York all summer. I met a lot of great people out there. And then I had to go back to school. Thus I had to go through the long process of saying good-bye to as many of my friends as I could. A midst all the hands shakes and hugs and general good feeling, I couldn't help but feel that you never see anything like this in a movie. My good-bye sequence didn't have the same emotional weight that you can get on film. It wasn't that I didn't care about my friends as much as some fictitious floozy from a New York fashion industry, but that I wasn't trying to impress anyone with any emotional response. When we say good-bye, we do it to communicate to each specific person that they are important, and we want to leave on the right foot.
I think that this romanticized view that we get can often hamper our relationships. We get caught up in the idea that our farewell has to be some heart rending process that we sometimes forget to even see some people. I know that there were people who left before me, and I also knew that I saw very few of them to say good-bye, even though they had been a friend while working. I'm not saying that they hate me, just that they may have gotten so caught up in a proper good-bye to others that I slipped through the cracks.
I also believe that our flair for the dramatic is also an issue. I'm a theater guy, so I know what it means to be dramatic, and I've seen some very good actors in my short run. With that, I feel that I have seen some of the same type of acting in how people say good-bye. They want to make the best impact they can. Whether it is an unexpected going away present, the perfect sentimental words, or a meaningful kiss on the cheek (wanted or otherwise), we try so hard to make an point in our good-bye. I feel that this mentality can trivialize a friendship somewhat, that you don't think your friendship with the other person is all that they need, that they need some movie style farewell to really call you their peer.
Lastly, all the crying is an issue with me. My mom cried when I went off to college, I cried when I left my parents of my mission trip in Australia back in eighth grade. People cry when the move, when a boyfriend or girlfriend leaves, or just when there is something new that they have to leave for. We get so sad over having to leave. When I left camp, I was excited to get back to school. Sure I was going to miss people, but I can't say I was sad. when one of my friends was leaving (he came to see me) I told him that we have at least one more guaranteed time that we will see each other. That's the beauty of being a Christian. When we die, there will be a gathering of us all in heaven. We will see each other again and never have to worry about good-bye. That is a hope I live with. The German's have a term, auf wiedershen, meaning "until we see each other again." I have always liked that phrasing more. Good-bye sometimes seems hopeless, but auf wiedershen is a term that means you both have hope for seeing someone, and a desire to as well.
I don't mind the celebration, however, when i don't have to see certain people again.
Just something to chew on.
Why do we romanticize leaving so much?
Like I've said before, I'm not a big movie guy. I do, however, know enough about movie cliches to point to all those moody romantic movies that invariably have a scene were someone is either walking away and causing tension and angst, or someone is walking away with serious hope and a new found sense of purpose. While I realize that only little kids and autistic monkeys might think their lives will end up like movies, I also feel that we try to create such emotion in our good-byes.
I worked at a camp in New York all summer. I met a lot of great people out there. And then I had to go back to school. Thus I had to go through the long process of saying good-bye to as many of my friends as I could. A midst all the hands shakes and hugs and general good feeling, I couldn't help but feel that you never see anything like this in a movie. My good-bye sequence didn't have the same emotional weight that you can get on film. It wasn't that I didn't care about my friends as much as some fictitious floozy from a New York fashion industry, but that I wasn't trying to impress anyone with any emotional response. When we say good-bye, we do it to communicate to each specific person that they are important, and we want to leave on the right foot.
I think that this romanticized view that we get can often hamper our relationships. We get caught up in the idea that our farewell has to be some heart rending process that we sometimes forget to even see some people. I know that there were people who left before me, and I also knew that I saw very few of them to say good-bye, even though they had been a friend while working. I'm not saying that they hate me, just that they may have gotten so caught up in a proper good-bye to others that I slipped through the cracks.
I also believe that our flair for the dramatic is also an issue. I'm a theater guy, so I know what it means to be dramatic, and I've seen some very good actors in my short run. With that, I feel that I have seen some of the same type of acting in how people say good-bye. They want to make the best impact they can. Whether it is an unexpected going away present, the perfect sentimental words, or a meaningful kiss on the cheek (wanted or otherwise), we try so hard to make an point in our good-bye. I feel that this mentality can trivialize a friendship somewhat, that you don't think your friendship with the other person is all that they need, that they need some movie style farewell to really call you their peer.
Lastly, all the crying is an issue with me. My mom cried when I went off to college, I cried when I left my parents of my mission trip in Australia back in eighth grade. People cry when the move, when a boyfriend or girlfriend leaves, or just when there is something new that they have to leave for. We get so sad over having to leave. When I left camp, I was excited to get back to school. Sure I was going to miss people, but I can't say I was sad. when one of my friends was leaving (he came to see me) I told him that we have at least one more guaranteed time that we will see each other. That's the beauty of being a Christian. When we die, there will be a gathering of us all in heaven. We will see each other again and never have to worry about good-bye. That is a hope I live with. The German's have a term, auf wiedershen, meaning "until we see each other again." I have always liked that phrasing more. Good-bye sometimes seems hopeless, but auf wiedershen is a term that means you both have hope for seeing someone, and a desire to as well.
I don't mind the celebration, however, when i don't have to see certain people again.
Just something to chew on.
Friday, August 19, 2011
A Score to Settle
I've never been a big movie guy. I like some, but all in all, I'm not a huge fan. I do have friends, however, who are major movie addicts. I think, actually, that a great portion of people are really into movies of late. With that, I've noticed an trend in how people appreciate movies away from the silver screen. I have a bit of an issue with this latest trend.
I don't get why people like movie soundtracks.
I suppose what I mean by that is the score of a movie rather than that crappy CD that gets released with unrelated pop music slapped on it. What I'm talking about are the orchestral pieces by guys like Hans Zimmer (Inception, The Dark Knight), Michael Giacchino (Mission Impossible, The Incredibles), and Atticus Ross (The Book of Eli, The Social Network). These are those dramatic, mood-setting works that usually play in the background of pivotal scenes.
Let me start by saying that I am not criticizing the music itself. These composers are very good, they create works that really add to the movie. The performers are phenomenal on their instruments. And of course, the sound guys do great work in their editing and perfecting. There is loads of talent in these scores, no one can deny that.
Here's the thing about scores. They are meant to add to the movie by subtly creating a feeling. The dark and dramatic battle music could create some excitement, the light, airy castle music sets a care free mood, the soft, mysterious theme of a villain adds to their presence. All of these are background music, however. The action by actors and other visual elements are the real draw. The ironic thing about scores are, if they are good, then you shouldn't notice them, but if they are bad, then they stick out like a sore thumb.
I don't see the draw in listening to the scores separately. I have in my possession the scores from Lord of the Rings, Pirates of the Caribbean, and Transformers. I already covered the talent behind them, so with that said, there not that special. I usually skip over them if they show up on shuffle. If I want to listen to some orchestra music, I have enough classical music to last me for a long while. I also think that my classical is better than these scores. Scores aren't meant to stand alone, that is my conclusion.
I do, however, differentiate between scores and theme songs. If you start humming the Star Wars theme, or the Indiana Jones theme, other people know these songs. They are incredibly memorable. That is something that I think is lost on many of the new soundtracks that play. There are a few songs here and there that people recognize, but nothing that is as iconic as some of these older ones. To me, so many of the different pieces sound the same, or at least incredibly similar. Certain sounds and combinations create feelings and emotions, so it isn't surprising that common elements are used in many scores, but I do believe that with some risk taking, composers can find new ways to create the same feelings in interesting and exciting ways.
On the other hand, Daft Punk had an awesome soundtrack for Tron.
Just something to chew on.
I don't get why people like movie soundtracks.
I suppose what I mean by that is the score of a movie rather than that crappy CD that gets released with unrelated pop music slapped on it. What I'm talking about are the orchestral pieces by guys like Hans Zimmer (Inception, The Dark Knight), Michael Giacchino (Mission Impossible, The Incredibles), and Atticus Ross (The Book of Eli, The Social Network). These are those dramatic, mood-setting works that usually play in the background of pivotal scenes.
Let me start by saying that I am not criticizing the music itself. These composers are very good, they create works that really add to the movie. The performers are phenomenal on their instruments. And of course, the sound guys do great work in their editing and perfecting. There is loads of talent in these scores, no one can deny that.
Here's the thing about scores. They are meant to add to the movie by subtly creating a feeling. The dark and dramatic battle music could create some excitement, the light, airy castle music sets a care free mood, the soft, mysterious theme of a villain adds to their presence. All of these are background music, however. The action by actors and other visual elements are the real draw. The ironic thing about scores are, if they are good, then you shouldn't notice them, but if they are bad, then they stick out like a sore thumb.
I don't see the draw in listening to the scores separately. I have in my possession the scores from Lord of the Rings, Pirates of the Caribbean, and Transformers. I already covered the talent behind them, so with that said, there not that special. I usually skip over them if they show up on shuffle. If I want to listen to some orchestra music, I have enough classical music to last me for a long while. I also think that my classical is better than these scores. Scores aren't meant to stand alone, that is my conclusion.
I do, however, differentiate between scores and theme songs. If you start humming the Star Wars theme, or the Indiana Jones theme, other people know these songs. They are incredibly memorable. That is something that I think is lost on many of the new soundtracks that play. There are a few songs here and there that people recognize, but nothing that is as iconic as some of these older ones. To me, so many of the different pieces sound the same, or at least incredibly similar. Certain sounds and combinations create feelings and emotions, so it isn't surprising that common elements are used in many scores, but I do believe that with some risk taking, composers can find new ways to create the same feelings in interesting and exciting ways.
On the other hand, Daft Punk had an awesome soundtrack for Tron.
Just something to chew on.
Sunday, August 14, 2011
Worthless
Praise music is a big deal many Churches and groups out there. I know there have been fights in my church over the music and what we play. People have probably heard me complain about a lot of Christian music before (And if you haven't, it'll be showing up in an entry at some point). Anyway, one thing that really bothers me is a recurring theme in so much of the music.
You are not worthless.
I hear a lot in Christian music how tarnished, broken, and generally worthless the singer thinks they are in God's eyes. They're deeply ashamed of sin, or have no value compared to God, they're unworthy of love, or they shouldn't be forgiven. All these things are true enough. There is no reason for us to get a big head over God's mercy, my complaints come from a lack of sense.
One main fact with being a Christian is that we are adopted into God's family, we are sons and daughters of God. This isn't the "red-headed stepchild" status, we are a part of the family and loved by God. That means we are valued members of the family, sharing in the wealth of the Father. We have worth. Our pitiful existences that we lived before being saved has been redeemed.
I hate to hear people always focusing on their shame. I see that as them looking for pity because of their old life. Whatever sin they had, they're still trying to use to gain some sympathy. I might be exaggerating things here (small chance) but I still think that focusing on past sins and failures isn't healthy. You can learn from your mistakes and move on.
Maybe I have an over inflated sense of self-worth, but I refuse to think of myself as dirt in God's sight. I know that He cares and that I am valued by God. Whatever I feel, however I sin, and whenever I fail, I know that God forgives me and that ultimately, that will outweigh any of my meager problems.
And if you're going to whine about me not putting in any verses in here, shut it. This is some musing, not a sermon.
Just something to chew on.
You are not worthless.
I hear a lot in Christian music how tarnished, broken, and generally worthless the singer thinks they are in God's eyes. They're deeply ashamed of sin, or have no value compared to God, they're unworthy of love, or they shouldn't be forgiven. All these things are true enough. There is no reason for us to get a big head over God's mercy, my complaints come from a lack of sense.
One main fact with being a Christian is that we are adopted into God's family, we are sons and daughters of God. This isn't the "red-headed stepchild" status, we are a part of the family and loved by God. That means we are valued members of the family, sharing in the wealth of the Father. We have worth. Our pitiful existences that we lived before being saved has been redeemed.
I hate to hear people always focusing on their shame. I see that as them looking for pity because of their old life. Whatever sin they had, they're still trying to use to gain some sympathy. I might be exaggerating things here (small chance) but I still think that focusing on past sins and failures isn't healthy. You can learn from your mistakes and move on.
Maybe I have an over inflated sense of self-worth, but I refuse to think of myself as dirt in God's sight. I know that He cares and that I am valued by God. Whatever I feel, however I sin, and whenever I fail, I know that God forgives me and that ultimately, that will outweigh any of my meager problems.
And if you're going to whine about me not putting in any verses in here, shut it. This is some musing, not a sermon.
Just something to chew on.
Friday, August 5, 2011
Circles of Life
Two decades, twenty years, two hundred forty months, 87,605 days, 2,102,520 hours, 126,151,200 minutes, or 7,569,072,000 seconds. However you look at it, I've been alive for a good stretch of time. There are lots of people older than me as well (obvious I know.) Life goes on for all of us, day after day, the same twenty-four hours for all of us. I've been thinking a lot about getting older and growing up, and I've come to at least one conclusion.
Life isn't too short.
I've heard a lot of people say that life is too short for this or that. Regret, waiting, or whatever, people seem to think that if they don't do it now, they never will. There is this overriding idea that opportunity will never come to you again, that a door or window will be shut and never be opened again. Life lived without taking every opportunity is a life wasted, or so they think.
I've only been alive for twenty years, that's not much compared to others, people who are more experienced than me. The older men in women that I know have lived their lives, had their experiences, and taken what opportunities they wanted. I have also had more chances to do things than those younger than me. I still feel, however, that the years I have lived have not been quick.
Life is bursting at the seems with opportunity. There is so much that I can do, so many chances to take. If life was so short, there would be so fewer opportunities for me to do anything. To think that I have missed an opportunity, that I will never be able to enjoy something like it again is ridiculous. I believe that if I "missed" something now, that I could have another chance later in life. It wouldn't be the exact situation, considering I will be older, possible a different man, but I will still have that chance.
I'm not advocating being lazy, or ignoring something exciting. Take every chance you get to enjoy yourself, and to learn about yourself. I am saying, however, not to stress or feel regret for something you didn't do. Maybe it's the idea that life goes in circles, that there will always be another chance to enjoy whatever life has to offer. Don't worry about missing out on life, there is always tomorrow and what it will bring.
I bet someone could make a really hope-filled love song with this idea...don't.
Just something to chew on.
Life isn't too short.
I've heard a lot of people say that life is too short for this or that. Regret, waiting, or whatever, people seem to think that if they don't do it now, they never will. There is this overriding idea that opportunity will never come to you again, that a door or window will be shut and never be opened again. Life lived without taking every opportunity is a life wasted, or so they think.
I've only been alive for twenty years, that's not much compared to others, people who are more experienced than me. The older men in women that I know have lived their lives, had their experiences, and taken what opportunities they wanted. I have also had more chances to do things than those younger than me. I still feel, however, that the years I have lived have not been quick.
Life is bursting at the seems with opportunity. There is so much that I can do, so many chances to take. If life was so short, there would be so fewer opportunities for me to do anything. To think that I have missed an opportunity, that I will never be able to enjoy something like it again is ridiculous. I believe that if I "missed" something now, that I could have another chance later in life. It wouldn't be the exact situation, considering I will be older, possible a different man, but I will still have that chance.
I'm not advocating being lazy, or ignoring something exciting. Take every chance you get to enjoy yourself, and to learn about yourself. I am saying, however, not to stress or feel regret for something you didn't do. Maybe it's the idea that life goes in circles, that there will always be another chance to enjoy whatever life has to offer. Don't worry about missing out on life, there is always tomorrow and what it will bring.
I bet someone could make a really hope-filled love song with this idea...don't.
Just something to chew on.
Saturday, July 30, 2011
Jesus Freaks
So, DC Talk was never a great band in my mind, but their song "Jesus Freak" seems to be a fitting title for this latest entry. Since I do go to a Christian school, and spend a good deal of time at a big Christian camp, I see many people who express their faith and beliefs differently. Some I agree with, others not so much. Yet I have noticed something that[s probably going to tick some people off.
I hope you take the term "Super Christian" as an insult.
Oh no, I bet I've crossed the line with some of my readers. How could I think anything like being a Super Christian is bad? I must have lost my mind or become an existentialist or something. Unlikely inner monologue aside, some of you might know what I'm talking about. When you hear "Super Christian," you probably have a certain image in your head, whether a generic idea, or someone you know. Let me describe what I see.
A Super Christian in my mind is something along he lines of a Bible-thumper. Everything they talk about has to do with God, or Jesus, what they learned or how they were blessed. There people are incredibly vocal about what they think God has been doing in their lives. Ask them how they're doing, and they'll fed you a line like, "God has given me a great day to enjoy."
All of this sounds pretty legitimate right? I understand what it is like to be excited by God's greatness and what He does for us. My problem is not with their excitement. I take issue with their consistency. I know a few Super Christian, and a common trend in them is that they talk their big game, but live like me. I am not perfect, I have some anger issues, I know when I sin, and I realize that I don't always put God first. That's what being human means. Super Christian are just like that, but they try to veneer their faults by slathering on the Christian buzz words. It seems like if they talk about God enough, people will ignore their shortcomings.
What really bothers me, is that the Super Christians believe that they are "above" me. I have been criticized by Super Christians for different short comings, and had various Bible verses vomited at me to prove me wrong. It's really amusing to see that the idea of quoting Bible verses for your own purpose is used by come Christians. Here's a verse for the Super Christian, " You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother’s eye. (Mathhew 7:5.)"
Not all people who always seem to revel in God are Super Christians. I know some who are indeed people who are connected to God and want to share their joy. Two men that I will name up at Camp-of-the-Woods are Cody Allen Rushing and Christien Jackson. These two men are knowledgeable in the Word, and dedicated to God. The reason they are different, to me, is because of how they live. Both men are full of love for those that they meet, and both can admit their failures. I have spent nights talking to Christien about my faults and his, and I always feel like I grow when we're finished.
How we live is who we are. Super Christian live like everyone else and sound like hypocrites when they speak. Real men and women of God live in him, and inspire when they speak. So many Christians, it seems, fail to recognize their own faults and failings. I believe that God saved us and has forgiven our sins, but that doesn't make us perfect. No amount of pretty Christian vocabulary can hide the truth of who you are.
And if someone says they'll pray that I change my mind one more time, I'm going to defenestrate them.
Just something to chew on.
I hope you take the term "Super Christian" as an insult.
Oh no, I bet I've crossed the line with some of my readers. How could I think anything like being a Super Christian is bad? I must have lost my mind or become an existentialist or something. Unlikely inner monologue aside, some of you might know what I'm talking about. When you hear "Super Christian," you probably have a certain image in your head, whether a generic idea, or someone you know. Let me describe what I see.
A Super Christian in my mind is something along he lines of a Bible-thumper. Everything they talk about has to do with God, or Jesus, what they learned or how they were blessed. There people are incredibly vocal about what they think God has been doing in their lives. Ask them how they're doing, and they'll fed you a line like, "God has given me a great day to enjoy."
All of this sounds pretty legitimate right? I understand what it is like to be excited by God's greatness and what He does for us. My problem is not with their excitement. I take issue with their consistency. I know a few Super Christian, and a common trend in them is that they talk their big game, but live like me. I am not perfect, I have some anger issues, I know when I sin, and I realize that I don't always put God first. That's what being human means. Super Christian are just like that, but they try to veneer their faults by slathering on the Christian buzz words. It seems like if they talk about God enough, people will ignore their shortcomings.
What really bothers me, is that the Super Christians believe that they are "above" me. I have been criticized by Super Christians for different short comings, and had various Bible verses vomited at me to prove me wrong. It's really amusing to see that the idea of quoting Bible verses for your own purpose is used by come Christians. Here's a verse for the Super Christian, " You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother’s eye. (Mathhew 7:5.)"
Not all people who always seem to revel in God are Super Christians. I know some who are indeed people who are connected to God and want to share their joy. Two men that I will name up at Camp-of-the-Woods are Cody Allen Rushing and Christien Jackson. These two men are knowledgeable in the Word, and dedicated to God. The reason they are different, to me, is because of how they live. Both men are full of love for those that they meet, and both can admit their failures. I have spent nights talking to Christien about my faults and his, and I always feel like I grow when we're finished.
How we live is who we are. Super Christian live like everyone else and sound like hypocrites when they speak. Real men and women of God live in him, and inspire when they speak. So many Christians, it seems, fail to recognize their own faults and failings. I believe that God saved us and has forgiven our sins, but that doesn't make us perfect. No amount of pretty Christian vocabulary can hide the truth of who you are.
And if someone says they'll pray that I change my mind one more time, I'm going to defenestrate them.
Just something to chew on.
Friday, July 22, 2011
Christ and the Dating Game
I love going into bookstores and seeing books that I have reviewed sitting on the shelves. It's cool to think that my review might cause someone to buy it, then have their lives changed. Today I was in the Camp bookstore, looking through the numerous lifestyle books. At the bottom of one shelf was a whole section on christian singles. I browsed the books, not finding anything interesting. I did, however, think of something odd while looking at the content of so many.
Do christian guys not need to know how to date?
While examining the books, I saw a good number of them for girls about how to date in a christian manner. There were things like not seeking "Mr. Right" but being "Ms. Right," others on being independent, but also dedicated to another, and more. It's definitely a good idea to offer this kind of advice, christian dating is a murky thing, and the words of some "experts" can always help out.
Now, when looking at the books targeted to men, I saw, mainly, one trend in all of them. Most of the books were about remaining pure until God's appointed time. I realize that remaining pure is a wonderful goal to strive for, and something that requires learning and dedication. However, is that the only thing that a single man's life is about?
I wish there were more books about being christian, single men in a world where dating is so confusing. I admit that I have never actually dated anyone. There have been the odd situation once or twice, but not what I would consider actual dating. I think that I would be more inclined to pursue a dating relationship if I could get some insight before plunging into that tumultuous sea.
I know that a book can't teach everything, and may only offer some very small part of a grander puzzle. However, I believe it is better to go with some preparation, than totally blind. Life experience is one of the only ways to learn how to act in a dating relationship. Let's be honest, life experience can be painful, sometimes earth shattering.
The main reason I would like some kind of book on the subject, is because I would like to know how a christian mindset deals with life issues. There are enough secular books about dating and hooking-up to fill a trashy library, but I have not found too many books that deal with how to deal in a Christ like manner with a girlfriend, or how to follow God's will in a deeper relationship. Practical "skills" are one thing, but knowing how to be godly in your dealings with the sensitive feelings that we hold deep.
Even though I consider myself an aspiring writer, to whom nothing is off limits, I don't think that I am the person to write this kind of book, at least not at this, or any foreseeable, period of life. I do think, however, that there are enough strong christians out there, single and married, who can help teach the young and the restless like myself. I'm willing to take the plunge someday, but I have no idea when that will be.
And no (mother) I'm not ruling out any possibilities God might throw at me.
Just something to chew on.
Do christian guys not need to know how to date?
While examining the books, I saw a good number of them for girls about how to date in a christian manner. There were things like not seeking "Mr. Right" but being "Ms. Right," others on being independent, but also dedicated to another, and more. It's definitely a good idea to offer this kind of advice, christian dating is a murky thing, and the words of some "experts" can always help out.
Now, when looking at the books targeted to men, I saw, mainly, one trend in all of them. Most of the books were about remaining pure until God's appointed time. I realize that remaining pure is a wonderful goal to strive for, and something that requires learning and dedication. However, is that the only thing that a single man's life is about?
I wish there were more books about being christian, single men in a world where dating is so confusing. I admit that I have never actually dated anyone. There have been the odd situation once or twice, but not what I would consider actual dating. I think that I would be more inclined to pursue a dating relationship if I could get some insight before plunging into that tumultuous sea.
I know that a book can't teach everything, and may only offer some very small part of a grander puzzle. However, I believe it is better to go with some preparation, than totally blind. Life experience is one of the only ways to learn how to act in a dating relationship. Let's be honest, life experience can be painful, sometimes earth shattering.
The main reason I would like some kind of book on the subject, is because I would like to know how a christian mindset deals with life issues. There are enough secular books about dating and hooking-up to fill a trashy library, but I have not found too many books that deal with how to deal in a Christ like manner with a girlfriend, or how to follow God's will in a deeper relationship. Practical "skills" are one thing, but knowing how to be godly in your dealings with the sensitive feelings that we hold deep.
Even though I consider myself an aspiring writer, to whom nothing is off limits, I don't think that I am the person to write this kind of book, at least not at this, or any foreseeable, period of life. I do think, however, that there are enough strong christians out there, single and married, who can help teach the young and the restless like myself. I'm willing to take the plunge someday, but I have no idea when that will be.
And no (mother) I'm not ruling out any possibilities God might throw at me.
Just something to chew on.
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