I find that book about the five love languages to be interesting. I wonder how long it took him to settle on those five specifically. I don't disagree with them, and I believe that they are very accurate, but I have wondered if they are the only love languages out there. These kinds of musings has made me decide to add a few to the list. The first is one that I feel fits me.
My love language is torment.
Sounds nasty right? My love language is apparently to ruin people's worlds. And yet, when I look at it, this really fits me. Keep in mind that this isn't torture. I'm not into putting people on the rack and stretching them until they split. That's wrong, weird, and would raise some serious questions that I don't think anyone wants to ask. Let's move on, quickly.
I express my affection in a more abrasive way. I love to mess with people. Every chance my friends give me for a witty or sarcastic comment, I take. I'm not out to make them feel bad, just to have some fun. To me, it shows that I am very comfortable around people. The closer I am with people, the more I tend to give them a hard time.
It's interesting when I look at this. I've graphed it out in my head a few times, and I've found an interesting anomaly. Once I become close enough to someone, I find that the curve drops drastically. I have people that I've known well who I don't be so harsh with. Weird right? I still am, just not to the same extent. I guess you could call it a right of passage, a trial by fire. If someone is willing to take that much abuse from me, then they're able to let me be a little more real with them.
And there is a difference between my fun sarcasm, and the tone I take with people I don't like. I've seen it before, people who tick me off get a different form of cynic. I find myself to be very biting in my comments to them. It's not the funny, witty banter, but real solid insults. I guess that confuses some people. They look at how I treat my friends, and how I treat some others, and they don't see it. Well, I blame them for that. There are ways to tell, and they only require a little investigation.
Love languages are an interesting thing. We all have our own way of showing our affection, and as accurate as the five common ones are, I don't think they get to the heart of how we interact. They're an umbrella, covering most of the types. I think it's good that we're all unique in our affections.
One a side note, that uniqueness makes it really difficult to gauge people, but that's for another time.
Just something to chew on.
Thursday, April 28, 2011
Friday, April 8, 2011
Mirror, mirror...
Anyone who knows about the existence of a little company called Disney should be able to finish the above line. The old queen was jealous of Snow White, and sent her away. Recently, I've been thinking a bit about things like looks and self-confidence. Here's my latest thought:
Get some self-esteem kids!
Harsh, yes, but necessary I think. There are a bunch of people who aren't happy with how they look, and who think that they're looks define them. Shallow right? But I think we all do it. There are always times when you look at someone and think, "Man, if I were that pretty," or "that muscular," or :"that tall." We compare ourselves to others all the time.
If this is such a part of human nature, you might be asking yourself why I am venting about it. Here's my little issue. Many people I hear bemoaning their looks are better looking then they think. I live in a dorm of guys and girls, and I thoroughly love it. Now, I put this out there so that when I say, I have seen people looking their best, and their worst, you can know I have an interesting sample.
I've hear many girls talking about how they wish they were taller, or skinner, or weighed more (surprising, I know), or looked better in this or that. These types of complaints bother me. I don't think that we can honestly judge how we look. We'll either be arrogant, and over estimate how good looking we are, or under sell ourselves. I look around, and each complaint I hear seems wholly nonsensical to me. I takes some will power not to reach over and slap the back of their heads in frustration. I've heard similar complaints from some of the guys, and it's just as irksome.
Here's what I purpose, we should, as a society, be allowed to ask if we look good, or tell someone they look good. Don't try and tell me that we are like that all ready. I can't go up to a person I don't know and say they look pretty, that'll start raising questions and accusations in their mind. Sometimes I just want to be allowed to compliment someone without being interrogated after. One of the main causes for low self-esteem, in my mind, is that we refuse to let someone compliment us. If we would, I think that there wold be less fixation on body image.
On a side note, I know it is probably weird to hear me complaining about not being able to compliment someone, don't get used to it.
Just something to chew on.
(Daily Application: If you want to increase your self-esteem a little, do what I do. When you pass a mirror, stop, look at yourself, and tell yourself that you look good today. It might sound egotistical, but if someone else won't say it, we should at least be allowed to.)
Get some self-esteem kids!
Harsh, yes, but necessary I think. There are a bunch of people who aren't happy with how they look, and who think that they're looks define them. Shallow right? But I think we all do it. There are always times when you look at someone and think, "Man, if I were that pretty," or "that muscular," or :"that tall." We compare ourselves to others all the time.
If this is such a part of human nature, you might be asking yourself why I am venting about it. Here's my little issue. Many people I hear bemoaning their looks are better looking then they think. I live in a dorm of guys and girls, and I thoroughly love it. Now, I put this out there so that when I say, I have seen people looking their best, and their worst, you can know I have an interesting sample.
I've hear many girls talking about how they wish they were taller, or skinner, or weighed more (surprising, I know), or looked better in this or that. These types of complaints bother me. I don't think that we can honestly judge how we look. We'll either be arrogant, and over estimate how good looking we are, or under sell ourselves. I look around, and each complaint I hear seems wholly nonsensical to me. I takes some will power not to reach over and slap the back of their heads in frustration. I've heard similar complaints from some of the guys, and it's just as irksome.
Here's what I purpose, we should, as a society, be allowed to ask if we look good, or tell someone they look good. Don't try and tell me that we are like that all ready. I can't go up to a person I don't know and say they look pretty, that'll start raising questions and accusations in their mind. Sometimes I just want to be allowed to compliment someone without being interrogated after. One of the main causes for low self-esteem, in my mind, is that we refuse to let someone compliment us. If we would, I think that there wold be less fixation on body image.
On a side note, I know it is probably weird to hear me complaining about not being able to compliment someone, don't get used to it.
Just something to chew on.
(Daily Application: If you want to increase your self-esteem a little, do what I do. When you pass a mirror, stop, look at yourself, and tell yourself that you look good today. It might sound egotistical, but if someone else won't say it, we should at least be allowed to.)
Sunday, April 3, 2011
Force of Will
So, I've been meaning to put something up, and this is all I can think of. I've started running, mostly because my Fitness for Life class tells me I have to do something physical, but also because I've been meaning to anyway. I've considered myself in a "relaxed" physical state, and I don't really think of myself as a big time runner. That being said, there is something really fascinating that the human body can do.
Our drive to keep going is amazing.
I run "The Loop" around campus, a stretch of road all the way around the main buildings that goes for something like 1.1 miles. It works for the exercise that I need. I run, usually, late at night, something like 1 or 2 in the morning. It's quiet and I can run without thinking people are watching me. I'm not self conscious mind you, I just look a little odd: toe running shoes, cargo shorts, whatever t-shirt I happened to have on at the time, a bandanna, and the lanky frame.
All that build up, and it doesn't really pertain to what I'm saying. At about 3/4 of the way, usually near the chapel, I feel my legs giving out. They feel like they'll just not let me go any further. Yet, I have never stopped because of fatigue, (there was one time I stopped running, but that was because a bus full of people were leaving for a Spring break trip, and I decided to see them off.) The thing that keeps me going is a desire to get to the end.
Ambition is such an amazing quality. God gives us a drive to do something, and we can do it. I love that my body has limits that I can push past. Late night running is one thing, but I know that I can do more in my life. I want to apply that same doggedness to other areas, like doing more reviews for Doc, or getting a major role in a play.
On a side note, I've cut my running time down. I started at about 10 minutes, and am at about 9 at this point. Hooray for measurable progress.
Just something to chew on.
Our drive to keep going is amazing.
I run "The Loop" around campus, a stretch of road all the way around the main buildings that goes for something like 1.1 miles. It works for the exercise that I need. I run, usually, late at night, something like 1 or 2 in the morning. It's quiet and I can run without thinking people are watching me. I'm not self conscious mind you, I just look a little odd: toe running shoes, cargo shorts, whatever t-shirt I happened to have on at the time, a bandanna, and the lanky frame.
All that build up, and it doesn't really pertain to what I'm saying. At about 3/4 of the way, usually near the chapel, I feel my legs giving out. They feel like they'll just not let me go any further. Yet, I have never stopped because of fatigue, (there was one time I stopped running, but that was because a bus full of people were leaving for a Spring break trip, and I decided to see them off.) The thing that keeps me going is a desire to get to the end.
Ambition is such an amazing quality. God gives us a drive to do something, and we can do it. I love that my body has limits that I can push past. Late night running is one thing, but I know that I can do more in my life. I want to apply that same doggedness to other areas, like doing more reviews for Doc, or getting a major role in a play.
On a side note, I've cut my running time down. I started at about 10 minutes, and am at about 9 at this point. Hooray for measurable progress.
Just something to chew on.
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